Random stuff about today

Its 4 am ....AND I´M BLOGGING , actualy reposting what I had posted on the entries page...its bether here. I like how its not compact and stuff.

And also, HELLLOO yes you that are reading my last  entries, I dont know who you are but , feel youserlf at home...did this sentece made sence ? I dont think so...

ANIWAY.

Today was a wild day... it was wild, but I stayed at home, Lies ,I did went outside once, but my back hurts like hell when I walck so I cant go ,still , monday I will have my back fixed muahahahah!
I finaly decided.
Im going to make an Aspie group suport! Yes! We need to show Aspies that they are not aloone!!!
If you are from Portugal and you are reading this and you have AS....consider yourself at home and go to Aspies Pt on facebook.

JOIN THE ARMY!!!

Wow....I shout a lot at 4 in the morning * rools eyes *

I actualy have an "anoucement" for this blog.

THIS BLOG IS NOT ABOUT ALL HAPPY AND FLUFLY STUFF, BECOUSE THIS IS ABOUT LIFE AND LIFE IS HARD SOMETIMES, AND SOMETIMES ITS SAD.

So sometimes you´re gonna see some depressive stuff, but I have to say it becouse this is the way I cope with stuff, I find it out that i get less into depression if I do this here. 

SO, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

That said, I´m going to talk about sad stuff.
Im turning 20 in a few hours.
And life is ....kinda wierd.
Im allmost twenty and I havent finished highschool.....*shakes head`*
And that keeps me frustrated, I want to do something I love, something I´m passionate about, until I get to school again! Something that would change the world, okay , something with meaning.
I love arts , I love paiting I wouldnt mind doing that ....IF THERE WAS SOMETHING LIKE THAT NEAR WHERE I LIVE !
There isint and that makes me nuts.
Sure I could paint in my home... but I want to be sorrounded with people. And I want to laugh with them and trhow paint at them and vice versa.

Paint warrr!

But this stupid goverment dosent let me.

I wanted to be able to go t oUni without highschool, I know if I study for the exams I would pass, but to make the exams you have to be in some school.

I toght about going aboard ....but that costs money and I dont think I would survive out of my country, AS.

I need my routines my people my religion !!! XD

So with all of that , yesterday I went to my bed at 3 am depressive shaking and crying as I grabed a teddy, and felt assleep on it.

Today I got to tell about a trauma that hunted me a lot. Im not gonna put this in cofessions yet. So you have to waith to get what I´m talking about.
And I got to tell to someone that went troght the same thing , and it was an intensive experience. it was like i was reviving everything the pain the panic, everything I allmost cried, BUT I DIDNT WICH MADE ME PROUD AT MY SELF!!! And I was shcking a litle, but then Daughtry came along. !
And made my day bether. I actualy like to share those kinds of stories becouse I get to help other people, as I said live isint just god  moments , and we need each other to learn how to cope and be strong and survive in this wild word.

-------------On a lighter note-------------------

TOMORROW IS MY BIRTHDAYYYY - by tomorrow I mean 2 hours our so. !!!

I begged my mom to buy me the last JUMP issue with Naruto, at first she said yes....but then ...CLOTHS DANIELA CLOTHS.
Can I get Narnia then ?
NO.

Baaah. See this is what people dont get, we Aspies perfer books and other things to cloths, becouse books and this other thigs are OXIGEN TO US. IM DEAD SERIOUS.

One of the things that I dont like is still having to ask for stuff when I could be working.....GRRRRAAA but I CANT BECOUSE IM NOT MENTALY PREPARED, NOT BECOUSE IM LAZY , NOT BECOUSE IM RETARDED BUT I JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT.

ASPERGER SINDROM EVERYONE.

It as good things and bad things.... well its not realy the AS fault its from the people that dont understand AS.

But okay.

Now I got that out of my chest.

I might go to sleep...might....

20 Im so old.